Her evlilikte birtak\u0131m s\u0131k\u0131nt\u0131lar ya\u015fanabilir.
\nE\u015flerin birbirlerini tan\u0131malar\u0131 ve uyum sa\u011flamalar\u0131 esnas\u0131nda baz\u0131 p\u00fcr\u00fczler olabilir. Sevginin y\u0131pranmamas\u0131 ve mutlulu\u011fun zedelenmemesi i\u00e7in dikkat edilmesi gereken husus; bu s\u0131k\u0131nt\u0131lar\u0131 probleme d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015ft\u00fcrmeden a\u015fmakt\u0131r.<\/p>\n
1) Problem kitab\u0131 de\u011fil, \u00e7\u00f6z\u00fcm anahtar\u0131 olun<\/b>
\nEvlilikteki problemi \u00e7\u00f6zmenin tek yolu problem \u00e7\u0131karmamakt\u0131r. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc problem kitab\u0131n\u0131n olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131 yerde \u00e7\u00f6z\u00fcm kitap\u00e7\u0131\u011f\u0131 da olmaz. Ancak insan iradesi olmadan \u00e7\u0131kan problem kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda \u00e7\u00f6z\u00fcme odaklanmak, problem kitab\u0131 olmak yerine cevap anahtar\u0131 olmak gerek.<\/p>\n
2) \u00c7\u00f6z\u00fcme harcayaca\u011f\u0131n\u0131z enerjiyi panikle t\u00fcketmeyin<\/b>
\nProblem kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda problemi \u00e7\u00f6zmeye harcayaca\u011f\u0131n\u0131z enerjiyi panikle t\u00fcketmeyin. T\u0131pk\u0131 d\u00fc\u015fman askeri gelmeden d\u00fc\u015fmana sald\u0131r\u0131p mermisini t\u00fcketen asker gibi olmay\u0131n. Su-i zanlarla ve \u0093ben \u00f6yle tahmin etmi\u015ftim. Eee, ben \u015f\u00f6yle sanm\u0131\u015ft\u0131m\u0094 c\u00fcmleleriyle anlay\u0131p dinlemeden hareket etmeyin. Problem yokken problem varm\u0131\u015f gibi davranmay\u0131n. Unutmay\u0131n ki, tahrip kolay, tamir zordur. Bir s\u00f6zle e\u015finizin kalp saray\u0131n\u0131 y\u0131kabilirsiniz. Fakat bin s\u00f6zle tamir edemezsiniz.<\/p>\n
3) \u0091Ke\u015fke\u0092 dememeye \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131n<\/b>
\nS\u00fcrekli yanl\u0131\u015f yap\u0131p, problem \u00e7\u0131kararak e\u015finizi can\u0131ndan bezdirmeyin. \u0093Art\u0131k can\u0131ma yetti senin kaprislerini \u00e7ekemeyece\u011fim\u0094 dedirterek sevgisini kaybetmeyin. \u0093Ke\u015fke \u015funu yapmasayd\u0131m, ke\u015fke bunu s\u00f6ylemeseydim. Ke\u015fke \u015fimdiki akl\u0131m olsayd\u0131\u0094 vb. s\u00f6zleri s\u00f6ylemek zorunda kalmay\u0131n. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc sevgi g\u00fcne\u015f gibidir. Siz g\u00f6n\u00fcl pencerelerinizi sonuna kadar a\u00e7arsan\u0131z o g\u00fcne\u015f i\u00e7eriye bol bol girer. Pencerelerinizi s\u0131k\u0131 s\u0131k\u0131ya kapat\u0131rsan\u0131z yol bulup i\u00e7eriye giremez. \u0093Benim g\u00fcne\u015fim bir yolunu bulup girer\u0094 demeyin. Sonuna kadar a\u00e7\u0131k olan g\u00f6n\u00fcl pencerelerinden birine kayabilece\u011fini g\u00f6z \u00f6n\u00fcnde tutun.<\/p>\n
4) \u0091Ama\u0092 silah\u0131ndan uzak durun<\/b>
\nHata yapmayan bir melek gibi davranmay\u0131n. Hep kendinizi m\u00fcdafaa etmeyin. E\u015finiz \u0093\u015funu neden \u015f\u00f6yle yapt\u0131n?\u0094 dedi\u011fi zaman \u0093ama\u0094 silah\u0131na sar\u0131lmay\u0131n. Ya da s\u00fcrekli \u0093ama ben \u00f6yle s\u00f6ylememi\u015ftim. Ama, ama\u0094 diye \u0093ama\u0094 silah\u0131n\u0131n arkas\u0131na gizlenerek e\u015finize ate\u015f etmeyin. Kar\u015f\u0131n\u0131zda ate\u015f edecek d\u00fc\u015fman de\u011fil, sevgisini kazanman\u0131z gereken dostunuz var. Unutmay\u0131n \u0093dostun att\u0131\u011f\u0131 g\u00fcl\u0094 d\u00fc\u015fman\u0131n att\u0131\u011f\u0131 silahtan daha \u00e7ok yaralar.<\/p>\n
5) Kendinizi polis hafiyesi sanmay\u0131n<\/b>
\nKimi e\u015fler, e\u015flerinin yanl\u0131\u015flar\u0131n\u0131 y\u00fczlerine kar\u015f\u0131 dobra dobra s\u00f6ylerler. Kendilerini e\u015flerinin yanl\u0131\u015flar\u0131n\u0131 ara\u015ft\u0131rmakla g\u00f6revli polis hafiyesi gibi g\u00f6r\u00fcrler. Sebebi soruldu\u011funda \u0093ben do\u011fruyu s\u00f6yl\u00fcyorum. Onun yanl\u0131\u015f\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6steriyorum. Onun iyili\u011fini d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcyorum\u0094 diyerek kendilerini m\u00fcdafaa ederler. Halbuki, her do\u011fru her yerde s\u00f6ylenmez. Her do\u011fruyu s\u00f6ylemek insan\u0131n g\u00f6revi de\u011fildir. Bir lokma ekmek bile \u00e7i\u011fnenmeden yutulmaz. \u00d6nce a\u011f\u0131zda \u00e7i\u011fnenir, mide \u00f6zsuyuyla par\u00e7alan\u0131r. Sonra ince ba\u011f\u0131rsakta s\u00fcz\u00fcl\u00fcr. \u015eayet \u00e7i\u011fnenmeden yutulursa ya bo\u011faza oturur ya da mideye.<\/p>\n
6) \u0130natla\u015fmay\u0131n<\/b>
\nKimi e\u015fler evlilikte \u00e7\u0131kan problemlerde bir t\u00fcrl\u00fc \u00e7\u00f6z\u00fcme yana\u015fmaz, inatla\u015f\u0131rlar. \u0093B\u00f6yle yapay\u0131m da bu ona ders olsun\u0094 havas\u0131na girerler. Acaba hangi \u00f6\u011frenci \u0093ben bu problemi \u00e7\u00f6zmeyeyim de \u00f6\u011fretmene ders olsun\u0094 diyebilir? Bu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnceyle \u00f6\u011fretmenle inatla\u015farak \u0093ben bu problemi \u00e7\u00f6zmem\u0094 diyen \u00f6\u011frenci s\u0131n\u0131fta kalmaya mahk\u00fbmdur.<\/p>\n
7) Kindar olmay\u0131n<\/b>
\nProblemlerin \u00e7\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcnde kilit nokta kindarl\u0131kt\u0131r. E\u015fler aras\u0131nda bir s\u0131k\u0131nt\u0131 ya\u015fanm\u0131\u015f ge\u00e7mi\u015ftir. E\u015flerden birisi olay\u0131 unuturken di\u011feri g\u00fcnlerce \u0093neden sen bana \u00f6yle s\u00f6yledin? Neden \u015f\u00f6yle davrand\u0131n? Niye bana hakaret ettin?\u0094 vb. s\u00f6zlerle olay\u0131 g\u00fcnlerce g\u00fcndemde tutarlar. Halbuki evlilikte problem oldu\u011fu zaman \u0093\u015fu an matematik dersindeyiz. \u00d6n\u00fcm\u00fczde bir problem var. Bunu \u00e7\u00f6zmeliyiz\u0094 diyerek problem \u00e7\u00f6z\u00fclmeli. Sonra da \u0093zil \u00e7ald\u0131 ve matematik dersi bitti\u0094 diyerek matematik dersinden \u00e7\u0131k\u0131lmal\u0131d\u0131r.<\/p>\n
8) Affedici olun<\/b>
\n\u0130nsan olmak hasebiyle e\u015finiz hata yapabilir. Sonra bunun fark\u0131na var\u0131p \u00f6z\u00fcr dileyebilir. Affedici olun \u0093Neden \u00f6yle yapt\u0131n?\u0094 vb. s\u00f6zlerle hesaba \u00e7ekmeyin. Kim affedici olursa o daima kazan\u0131r. Nitekim ayette de:
\n\u0093Bir hayr\u0131 a\u00e7\u0131klar veya gizlerseniz yahut bir k\u00f6t\u00fcl\u00fc\u011f\u00fc affederseniz (bilin ki), Allah da \u00e7ok affedicidir, her \u015feye hakk\u0131yla g\u00fcc\u00fc yetendir.\u0094 (4.149) buyruluyor.<\/p>\n
9) Evlili\u011fi \u00e7\u00f6z\u00fcm bekleyen problem de\u011fil, ya\u015fanmas\u0131 gereken mutluluk olarak g\u00f6r\u00fcn<\/b>
\nY\u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fczde tebess\u00fcm g\u00fclleri a\u00e7s\u0131n\u0085Lisan-\u0131 haliniz mutlulu\u011fun \u015fark\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 m\u0131r\u0131ldans\u0131n. Mutluluk t\u00fclleri evinizin her yan\u0131n\u0131 sars\u0131n. Eviniz saadet saray\u0131, siz iyilik perisi e\u015finiz de o saray\u0131n sevgili prensi olsun.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Her evlilikte birtak\u0131m s\u0131k\u0131nt\u0131lar ya\u015fanabilir. E\u015flerin birbirlerini tan\u0131malar\u0131 ve uyum sa\u011flamalar\u0131 esnas\u0131nda baz\u0131 p\u00fcr\u00fczler olabilir. Sevginin y\u0131pranmamas\u0131 ve mutlulu\u011fun zedelenmemesi...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":305,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[44,45,24,46],"class_list":["post-304","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-aile-danismanligi","tag-aile-problemleri-nasil-cozulur","tag-aile-sanismanligi","tag-evlilik-sorunlari","tag-evlilik-terapi"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ailedanismaniokanbal.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/304","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ailedanismaniokanbal.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ailedanismaniokanbal.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ailedanismaniokanbal.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ailedanismaniokanbal.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=304"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.ailedanismaniokanbal.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/304\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ailedanismaniokanbal.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ailedanismaniokanbal.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=304"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ailedanismaniokanbal.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=304"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ailedanismaniokanbal.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=304"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}