{"id":3985,"date":"2016-10-28T18:33:15","date_gmt":"2016-10-28T15:33:15","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.okanbal.com\/?p=3985"},"modified":"2016-10-28T18:33:15","modified_gmt":"2016-10-28T15:33:15","slug":"es-seciminde-dis-gorunus-de-onemlidir","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.ailedanismaniokanbal.com.tr\/blog\/3985\/es-seciminde-dis-gorunus-de-onemlidir\/","title":{"rendered":"E\u015f se\u00e7iminde d\u0131\u015f g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fc\u015f de \u00f6nemlidir"},"content":{"rendered":"

E\u015f se\u00e7iminde g\u00f6z \u00f6n\u00fcne al\u0131nan hususlardand\u0131r d\u0131\u015f g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fc\u015f. Kimisi bu durumu birinci s\u0131raya koyar kimisi de \u201cOrtak de\u011ferlerimiz ayn\u0131 olsun, huyu ahlak\u0131 g\u00fczel olsun, d\u0131\u015f g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fc\u015f\u00fc \u00f6nemli de\u011fil\u201d ifadelerini kullan\u0131r. Peki, bu iki yakla\u015f\u0131mdan hangisi daha do\u011fru? Evlenilecek ki\u015fide d\u0131\u015f g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fc\u015f ne kadar \u00f6nemli?<\/p>\n

G\u00fcnl\u00fck hayatta kar\u015f\u0131la\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z \u00f6rnekler g\u00f6steriyor ki d\u0131\u015f g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fc\u015f konusunda a\u015f\u0131r\u0131ya varmak da bu hususa hi\u00e7 \u00f6nem vermemek de evlilikte uyum problemlerine yol a\u00e7\u0131yor. Evlilikte sadece d\u0131\u015f g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fc\u015fe \u00f6nem veren ki\u015filer, di\u011fer hususlarda denkli\u011fi veya uyumu ihmal edebiliyor. Bu da ciddi s\u0131k\u0131nt\u0131larla yol a\u00e7abiliyor. E\u015f se\u00e7iminde her hususta denkli\u011fe \u00f6nem vermek esast\u0131r. Sevginin olu\u015fmas\u0131 sadece estetik g\u00fczelli\u011fe ba\u011fl\u0131 olmamakla beraber d\u0131\u015f g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fc\u015f de etkili etkilidir.<\/p>\n

Baz\u0131lar\u0131 d\u0131\u015f g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fc\u015f bak\u0131m\u0131ndan \u00e7ekici bulmad\u0131klar\u0131, tip olarak uygun g\u00f6rmedikleri ki\u015filerle; karakter, huy, meslek, dindarl\u0131k gibi evlilikte dikkate al\u0131nmas\u0131 gereken di\u011fer \u00f6zelliklere daha \u00e7ok \u00f6nem veriyor. \u0130leride al\u0131\u015f\u0131r\u0131m, severim d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncesiyle de evleniyor. Daha sonra ilk g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015fte rahats\u0131z eden \u00f6zellikler evlendikten sonra da i\u00e7ten i\u00e7e ki\u015fiyi huzursuz edebiliyor. Bu durum e\u015fe ifade edildi\u011finde ise problemler katlan\u0131yor. Unutulmamal\u0131 ki d\u0131\u015f g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fc\u015f bak\u0131m\u0131ndan \u00e7ekici bulmak da be\u011fenilmek de ihtiya\u00e7t\u0131r. E\u015fi taraf\u0131ndan d\u0131\u015f g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fc\u015f\u00fc dikkate al\u0131nmayan, buna \u00f6nem verilmeden se\u00e7im yap\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131 kendisine ifade edilen ki\u015filer ruhsal s\u0131k\u0131nt\u0131lar ve ileti\u015fim problemleri ya\u015f\u0131yor.<\/p>\n

Bununla beraber hi\u00e7 kimse m\u00fckemmel de\u011fildir. Baz\u0131 ufak kusurlar herkeste vard\u0131r ve \u00f6nemli bir problem te\u015fkil etmez. Ge\u00e7irilen baz\u0131 kazalar ise ba\u015fta hormon bozukluklar\u0131 olmak \u00fczere \u00e7ocukluk ve gen\u00e7likte ge\u00e7irilen hastal\u0131klar, ihmaller ki\u015fide baz\u0131 \u00f6nemli fiziki sorunlar\u0131n ortaya \u00e7\u0131kmas\u0131na sebep olabilir ki bunlar evlilikte e\u015f adaylar\u0131 a\u00e7\u0131s\u0131ndan s\u0131k\u0131nt\u0131l\u0131 durumlara yol a\u00e7abiliyor. Bilhassa y\u00fcz ifadesine etki eden ciddi cilt problemleri, g\u00f6z, a\u011f\u0131z, burun, di\u015f problemleri, sa\u00e7 problemleri, el ayak gibi v\u00fccudun di\u011fer k\u0131s\u0131mlar\u0131ndaki uyumsuzluklar e\u015f se\u00e7iminde d\u0131\u015f g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fc\u015f a\u00e7\u0131s\u0131ndan s\u0131k\u0131nt\u0131ya yol a\u00e7abiliyor. Bu sebeple \u00e7ocuklukta ilerisini d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnerek tedavi edilebilecek v\u00fccut kusurlar\u0131n\u0131n tedavisi ailelerin dikkat etmesi gereken hususlardand\u0131r.<\/p>\n

Asl\u0131nda g\u00fczellik genel olarak bakt\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131zda izafi bir kavramd\u0131r. Bir\u00e7ok ki\u015fi i\u00e7in as\u0131l \u00f6nemli olan e\u015f aday\u0131n\u0131n kendisine yak\u0131n hissetti\u011fi, i\u00e7inin \u0131s\u0131nabilece\u011fi, bir d\u0131\u015f g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fc\u015fe sahip olmas\u0131d\u0131r. Bunda karakter \u00f6zellikleri hakk\u0131nda da \u00f6nemli ipu\u00e7lar\u0131 veren, bak\u0131\u015f,\u00a0 ses tonu, mimikler, oturu\u015f, duru\u015f \u015fekli, \u00f6z bak\u0131m, giyim ku\u015fam da etkilidir. D\u0131\u015f g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fc\u015f sadece fiziki g\u00fczellik ve d\u00fczg\u00fcnl\u00fck olarak anla\u015f\u0131lmamal\u0131d\u0131r. Birisi i\u00e7in ideal olan bir tip, uzunluk, k\u0131sal\u0131k, esmerlik sar\u0131\u015f\u0131nl\u0131k vb. di\u011feri i\u00e7in olmayabilir. Evlilikte esteti\u011fe ve tipe \u00f6nem veren ki\u015fi kendisini tan\u0131mal\u0131, ileride problem ya\u015famamak i\u00e7in e\u015f se\u00e7iminde dikkatli olmal\u0131.<\/p>\n

Sonu\u00e7 olarak; d\u0131\u015f g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fc\u015f evlilik s\u00fcrecindeki uyumda, dindarl\u0131k, g\u00fczel huy, sosyoekonomik k\u00fclt\u00fcrel de\u011ferlerde denklik gibi etkili bir \u00f6zellik oldu\u011fundan e\u015f se\u00e7iminde g\u00f6z ard\u0131 edilmemelidir. Resulullah (sas)\u2019in aynaya bakt\u0131\u011f\u0131 zaman yarat\u0131l\u0131\u015f\u0131n\u0131n g\u00fczelli\u011finden dolay\u0131 \u015f\u00fckredip huyunun g\u00fczelli\u011fi i\u00e7in dua etme \u00f6rne\u011fi i\u00e7 ve d\u0131\u015f g\u00fczelli\u011finin birbirinin tamamlay\u0131c\u0131s\u0131 oldu\u011funu g\u00f6steren g\u00fczel \u00f6rneklerdendir. Ki\u015finin kendi bedenini g\u00fczel y\u00f6nleri ile olumlu olarak alg\u0131lamas\u0131 ruh sa\u011fl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131n da g\u00f6stergesidir.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Okan Bal
\nUzman Psikolojik Dan\u0131\u015fman ve Aile Terapisti<\/p>\n

Sorunlar\u0131n\u0131z\u0131n Daha Sa\u011fl\u0131kl\u0131 \u00c7\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc \u0130\u00e7in
\n\u201cOnline Terapi\u201d Randevusu Alabilirsiniz.<\/p>\n

\"onlineterapim-randevual\"<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

E\u015f se\u00e7iminde g\u00f6z \u00f6n\u00fcne al\u0131nan hususlardand\u0131r d\u0131\u015f g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fc\u015f. Kimisi bu durumu birinci s\u0131raya koyar kimisi de \u201cOrtak de\u011ferlerimiz ayn\u0131 olsun,...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3986,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3,145],"tags":[27,431,14,432,52,99,210,8,156],"class_list":["post-3985","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-aile-danismanligi","category-psikoloji","tag-aile-danismanligi","tag-aile-ici-sorunlar","tag-aile-sorunlari","tag-es-seciminde-dis-gorunus-de-onemlidir","tag-evlilik-terapisi","tag-evlilikte-iletisim","tag-online-psikolog","tag-sehitkamil-aile-danismanim","tag-sehitkamil-evlilik-terapisi"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ailedanismaniokanbal.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3985","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ailedanismaniokanbal.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ailedanismaniokanbal.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ailedanismaniokanbal.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ailedanismaniokanbal.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3985"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.ailedanismaniokanbal.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3985\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ailedanismaniokanbal.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ailedanismaniokanbal.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3985"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ailedanismaniokanbal.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3985"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ailedanismaniokanbal.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3985"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}